Backing up only the database is half a recovery, here's the rest

Backing up only the database is half a recovery, here's the rest
DB-only people relearn this the hard way: the site won't boot. Full checklist:
— Database, with the consistent-snapshot dump
— Uploaded media, the folder that's never in your repo
— Environment files, secrets, and config that aren't in git
— Web server, PHP, and cron configuration
— SSL certs and the exact software versions
Restore on a clean box. If it doesn't load, your DB backup was a souvenir. Fight me in the comments.